Sex.co.nz

Have the days of long passionate embraces and lovemaking sessions given way to the TV remote and flannel pj’s. Well here are a few tips to bring the passion back into the bedroom.

There are two types of sexual arousal, mental and physical and in the early relationship there is no shortage of physical stimuli and sexy thoughts and feelings but as a relationship progresses and familiarity becomes a problem we have to up the anti and get creative.

Start by having a look at your surroundings. Is there a pile of shoes in the corner, is the laundry basket over flowing, are you surrounded by photo’s of family…and dare I say ‘the kids’? Nice in the dinning room but not so good in what should be the adult sanctum of the house, your bedroom. Restore your bedroom to what it was way back when it all started, your private space, your fun space, your loving space.

1. Check for Mess: Take a good long critical look at your bedroom and imagine seeing it through the eyes of a stranger. Have you cringed yet? If so you know what to do, clean it up.

2. Eliminate the reminders of ordinary everyday life and make it somewhere very special expressly for the two of you. If this requires a little redecorating and some new linens and sexy lingerie so be it. It’s all in the name of loving.

3. Purge. Get rid of all the stuff you don’t need and all the stuff you don’t need reminding of when you’re ready for some intimate time together. And if this includes photo’s of the mother-in-law and the kids…hey, there are other places in the house where they will be just as happy. Don’t have a computer in the bedroom; it’s the BEDROOM not the office.

4. I hope this doesn’t make you cringe but cinnamon and vanilla have been proven to increase arousal and attraction so maybe some candles, or if that’s too much, try a little hidden potpourri. Other scents that are supposed to have libido-boosting qualities include frankincense, ginger, lavender, lime, orange, patchouli, and rose. It might even help with the sneaker smell that can linger way after the life of the sneaker.

5. Get Some Toys Together. There are some lovely shareable sex toys and kits on the market these days, some cheeky one too check out some of them here, have a very good quality lube and maybe some massage oils. We don’t need to tell you what to do from here, but try mixing it up a little, encourage your partner to talk about what turns them on and spend some time remembering what it used to be like. And hvae some fun.